During my commute to class, I notice the blinding sun glossing the tops of beautiful palm trees, and realize where I am. The desert of Arizona - over two thousand miles from the rolling greens of a place I’ve always known as home. Sometimes I still can’t believe I’m here. It’s like on those days I enter a zone of confusion, where I coast through my day at work in a blur. It’s not that I’m depressed during these moments, but just surprised or at a loss of understanding of how and why God brought me here. Four years ago, I swore aloud to other ears that I would never move away from my family, yet here I am.  
Don’t get me wrong; I don’t regret moving out here. The weather is amazing and I’m living with the man I love. It was a move of opportunity and chance‘This is the time to do it,’ many people said and they were right. We have no kids and our part time jobs were important experiences, but not those of careers. Nothing was concretely holding us back. We needed to try something new, and we wanted to experience it together. So at the end of last May, we packed up our things and traveled our way. And good things have come.

Although I do love it here, I've been fairly homesick lately. I come from a large family and they are my life. They are the reason I believe and the reason I have strength. Through the good and even bad memories, I have learned so much from my experience in Pennsylvania and it lead me to who I am today. Plus, even an adult needs her mommy and daddy sometimes. And I do have those cravings for a hug- make that hugs- from those at home. Nothing beats that huge squeeze of excitement you get from your little brother when he hasn’t seen you for five months. I want to feel that again already. Especially being so close to a big family holiday like Christmas, it’s hard not to think of them all.

We did recently fly home for Thanksgiving, and it seemed to go by so quickly. By the time we were back at the Harrisburg airport to return to our new home, I found myself dismally pointing out ‘It feels like we were just here...’ My boyfriend shared wise words: ‘...think of the details.’ He was right. When I focused on everything we did that week and everyone we’ve seen and spent time with, it made me realize how emotionally productive we had been. We built more great memories. It may not have seemed like enough time - it definitely wasn’t - but because we only had so little time to spend, we made the best of it that we could. We had such an amazing time with family and friends and each other. And the ton of smiles received are ingrained in my mind, and they keep me motivated every day.

God, I’m so blessed to have all of these wonderful people in my life. I’m thrilled to see where this journey flows with the support and love from them all, including that from my best friend and partner in this great adventure.  
Sometimes, you have to be apart from the people you love, but that doesn't make you love them any less. Sometimes, you love them more. ~The Last Song
12/10/2012 14:48:19

I love you<3

12/12/2012 15:02:54

I love you too! <3

12/11/2012 04:33:42

Awww Keara! When is the next time you'll be able to see them? Long distance relationships are always tough but always makes those visits extra special! Just know family is always around in spirit and that there are always email, letters, Skype, surprises, and of course, future visits. I think it's great that you started blogging because you'll have many opportunities to express your thoughts & feelings while missing them. It helps so much!!

12/12/2012 15:04:40

The next scheduled time will probably be in June of 2013, but hopefully we'll have some visitors before then. & soooo true! Thank you!!


Leave a Reply.